Give thanks even here...
even now...
Here we are, just a few days from celebrating Thanksgiving, and many families have the tradition of sharing something for which they are grateful. We do it every year. And most of the time the list is easy to come up with, but what if it has been a tougher year?
What if things really didn’t go so well for you? What then?
Well, the Biblical admonition is clear: “In EVERYTHING give thanks, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). That is a strong statement. There is no wiggle room there.
But can we just be totally candid about this? Sometimes submitting to that command is really hard to do.
Ever since I have taken on the role of a “Cancer Pastor” I have seen a lot more suffering. I have watched families empty out savings accounts trying to get better (using all kinds of non-traditional methodologies). I have held the hands of those who have lost loved ones (way too soon). And even with those who have survived this horrid illness, many have had to endure inexplicable pain and heartache. There are times when the treatment seems worse than the disease. How can one be thankful in times like this? It is hard to be grateful in any of that, and it feels disingenuous to try, because the truth is we simply are not grateful at all. Maybe you know this feeling.
<Heavy sigh>
So, let me come back to the scripture. Since it is God’s will that we be grateful IN every circumstance, it must be possible to do so. He would not ask us to do something that cannot be done. And it must be possible to do so authentically, because God is always looking for sincere worshipers.
That thought has led me to this conclusion: If God says that it is His will to give thanks in every situation, then it must also be true that in every situation there IS something for which we can authentically give thanks! And if all that is true, then the trick is to find the hidden gem that is genuinely praiseworthy in any and every situation. It must be there. We just have to find it.
Let me share analogy that has helped make sense of this for me.
On many days, I carry a little multi-tool in my pocket. Some time ago, my wife’s car died and wouldn’t start again. I am not a car guy, so when I arrived to help, I lifted the hood and tried to look like I knew what I was doing. But, in actuality, I had no idea what to look for, but in this instance, I noticed some heavy corrosion around the battery terminals.
Could it be this easy?
I pulled out my handy-dandy pocket tool and started scraping off the corrosive material. After some scratching and digging, I was able to create a better connection, and surprise, surprise, the car started right up! When it did, I sensed the Holy Spirit whispering in my soul, “Piet, remember this moment.”
That little car repair job taught me a vital life lesson: sometimes, to make the spiritual connection to genuine gratitude, you need to dig a little bit. And maybe that is what makes it so hard to do—because when you’re already exhausted and frustrated, who has the energy for that extra work?
But here was my personal discovery – once you authentically see that point of gratitude, you cannot unsee it. That vital connection stands out. Then, when we choose to express it, our entire perspective shifts, and God meets us in that exact moment. The result is a mysterious joy that defies the pain, lifting us above even the most heart-wrenching situations.
So, no matter what this season holds for you, may God grant us the grace to make that small, persistent effort—to dig a bit deeper and uncover the praise-worthy gem He has meant for us to find. Because, when we do, we will genuinely be able to give thanks, even amid the hardest thing.
“Thanksgiving is the way through our beautiful and brutal life…”
Ann Voskamp
Soul Care with
Pastor Jenn
To Pastor (verb): to shepherd, advise, and guide into a place of deeper spiritual understanding
“Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.”
It’s Thanksgiving week. I don’t know about you, but I have so much to be grateful for this year. Not everything has gone perfectly, but even so, the Lord has been good to me.
You’re probably wondering what any of this has to do with the scripture for this week. I’ve been digging into God’s word more than normal and I’ve discovered a wealth of things I didn’t know before. I think the Bible has to be the only book you can read over and over again for years and still see things you’ve never seen. God never fails to meet me in the pages of His Word.
Because of that, I’m especially grateful for the Word of God this year. It is full of wisdom, encouragement, philosophy, poetry, history and even some commiserating. And yes, for all of these reasons, it is a light on the path.
Such a beautiful gift.
If you haven’t read the Word lately, in earnest, I encourage you to jump back in. May it stir up a hunger in you for the things of God – yes, but also to hear His voice for yourself. He longs to spend time with you, even if only to remind you He is with you and loves you so much.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Caregivers Corner with
Kathi Peters
Caregiver (verb): One who provides direct support for one who is in need of practical help, encouragement and love.
Pause…
I was listening to a podcast the other day with John Eldredge in which he talked about the app he developed called One Minute Pause. (Check it out – it can be really helpful). I’ll confess that sometimes even the word “pause” causes me to feel overwhelmed.
Taking a moment to pause is so hard to do as a caregiver. You’re juggling so many things – schedules, doctor’s visits, supplements and meds, meal prep – juggling them mentally and physically. Maybe some days you’re afraid to pause because you feel the stress of all you’re dealing with will come crashing in on you. So you keep forging ahead and operate from desperation.
When bad news comes in the cancer journey (an initial diagnosis or challenging test results),
Pause…
When you’re scrambling to get everything done before you drop exhausted into bed at night where fear of the future can get bigger in the dark,
Pause…
When you feel like you’re losing yourself in the constancy of the journey,
Pause…
So what could you do during that pause? Here are a few suggestions:
- Find something to be grateful for. Gratitude clears judgement.
- Breathe deeply. I find this breathing pattern calming: inhale for 4 seconds, holding that breath for 7 seconds, and release it for 8 seconds.
- Go outside and ground yourself – barefoot in the grass. If the sun is out, turn your face toward it.
God is good. Remember He holds your days and those for whom you’re caring.
Worship Moment
with Joel Salabarria
To Inspire (verb): to fill someone with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.
Song: “House of Miracles” (Spotify and Apple Music)
Band: Brandon Lake
From: “House of Miracles” (2020)
This song invites us to see our lives as a place where change, healing and hope are not just possible they’re declared and therefore ours.
“This is a house of worship, this is a place of praise…”
- This is a statement that our gathering and our hearts aren’t just casual, but full of expectancy.
“This is a house of healing, our hearts are full of faith…”
- This reminds us that even our scars and doubts are greeted with faith that moves.
“We bring everything to the feet of Jesus… This is a house of miracles.”
- This is a call to surrender, bringing all we are and all we’ve been through, trusting that the miraculous still happens.
Friends, no matter what your yesterday looked like…..loss, delay, fear, or waiting today, is an invitation: Enter this House of miracles. Bring your hopes. Bring your unfulfilled promises. Bring your trust. Let the power of Christ meet you there.
You’re not coming into a place of passive waiting; you’re stepping into a place of expectation, faith and revival.
Piet's Ponderings
To Ponder (verb): to think about something carefully, especially before making a decision or reaching a conclusion.
One of my favorite songs back in the day was by the Little River Band entitled, “Listen to your heart.” I thought it had such a catchy tune, and enticing lyrics:
Listen to your heart
It knows right from wrong
Let it guide you
Listen to your heart
It will make you strong
Look inside of yourself and listen
Listen to your heart
But is it true? Ought we listen to our hearts, will it actually guide us reliably?
Consider the Columbine shooters, who believed what they were doing was right. Or the person who feels it’s right to leave their family because they’ve found a new love. If “listening to your heart” is our primary standard for behavior, then we have no objective way to judge whether any of these actions are right or wrong. It’s just my opinion against yours. And if my feelings change with a bad night’s sleep or a missed breakfast, how can I with integrity trust my own internal guide?
Perhaps this is why the Bible warns us, “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked.” (Jeremiah 17:9)
The good news is that we are not without hope. God promises to meet us and guide us onto paths of righteousness. We don’t have to be subjected to the ever-changing feelings of the moment or the conflicting opinions of the crowd. As Psalm 23 says:
The Lord is my shepherd;
I have everything I need.
He lets me rest in green meadows;
He leads me beside peaceful streams,
He renews my strength.
He guides me along right paths,
bringing honor to His name.
God takes pleasure in revealing what is right and good. He loves to take us by the hand and show us His ways. But then, the question becomes, “Will we listen to Him and not our hearts?”
Nutrition Nuggets with
Suzanna Hake
To Nourish (verb): the act or process of being nourished.
Contrast Therapy — The Best of Both Worlds
Over the last two weeks I have shared about the healing power of heat and the energizing benefit of cold, now let’s explore what happens when you combine the two.
Contrast therapy is the practice of alternating between heat (like a sauna or hot bath) and cold (like an ice plunge or cold shower). It’s an ancient wellness ritual that’s now backed by modern science, and for good reason! Switching between hot and cold creates a gentle “pump” effect in your circulatory system, helping flush out waste products, reduce inflammation, and speed up recovery.
But beyond the physical benefits, there’s something incredibly balancing and rejuvenating about this rhythm…the warmth opens you up, the cold wakes you up, and together they help regulate your nervous system in the most natural way.
You can start simple:
- Begin with 10–15 minutes of heat
- Follow with 30–60 seconds of cold
- Rest, breathe, and repeat once or twice
It’s less about perfection and more about tuning into how your body feels.
Wellness Tip: Support your recovery afterward with a nourishing smoothie — try blending greens, protein powder, and a spoonful of healthy fat (like avocado or nut butter) to refuel your cells.
Mayo Visit Update
After another series of tests and scans, I met with my doctor on Friday afternoon and he said, “You have become a very uninteresting patient! There is absolutely nothing exciting to report!” Every number has improved, and no cancer is detected anywhere! Thank you Lord! AND thank you for all your prayers!!
Here’s to boring being the new exciting…
Word of Encouragement
The blues and praise
To Encourage (verb): to give support and hope to someone so they will do or continue to do something
Music is one of my most reliable “spiritual pathways” – whenever I need a lift personally, I generally turn to music, there is just something about a great song that can consistently lift my spirits. And many of my friends seem similarly moved by music. So, when I come across a good song or band, I love to share it.
Well, recently I discovered a new band called Holy Groove that has created a series of Blues albums built around various books of the Bible: Proverbs in Blues, Isaiah in Blues, Ecclesiastes in Blues, Revelation in Blues (just to mention a few). But my favorite thus far is Psalm in Blues. I have been listening to it with such joy and wonder, not just for the musical interpretation, but for the ways in which it has been ministering to my soul.
So, if you are looking for something fresh and new, I hardly recommend you check them out on your favorite streaming platform. You won’t be disappointed – especially if you have a bit of a bluesy soul!
Support the work!
The Van Waarde Foundation underwrites and supports a variety of projects related to supporting, educating, and encouraging fellow cancer warriors and their families.
Thank you in advance for your prayerful consideration.
https://www.patreon.com/c/pietvanwaarde
Experiencing a cancer diagnosis is obviously a profound personal setback, and the added weight of self-blame can make it feel even heavier. While it’s natural to reflect on past choices and wonder if you have contributed to our own illness, getting stuck in a cycle of self-condemnation is a separate matter altogether. It’s crucial to acknowledge these feelings of guilt and remorse without letting them define you or impede your journey toward healing. This involves taking a thoughtful and compassionate approach to your past.
The first step in processing this guilt is to separate accountability from condemnation. It’s helpful to own the reality that some past behaviors may have been unhealthy, but this is an entirely different concept from believing you deserve this illness. You can acknowledge, for example, that a long-term smoking habit increased your risk of lung cancer without believing you are a bad person or that this is a form of punishment. True ownership means recognizing the consequences of past actions and committing to better choices moving forward. This is a path of learning and growth, not a cycle of shame.
The goal – and this is really important – is to shift your focus from “Why was I so foolish?” to “What can I do now?”
Next, it is vital to learn and practice self-compassion and forgiveness. Think of it this way: You wouldn’t speak to a friend with a similar diagnosis in a harsh and condemning way; instead you would offer them kindness and empathy. You must extend that same grace to yourself. Forgiveness isn’t about excusing past mistakes; it’s about releasing yourself from the burden of carrying them. You are a person who made certain choices – and yes, maybe some were unwise and irresponsible – but your diagnosis is not meant to define your worth. I am speaking to you as one who has had to work through these very same feelings.
I have resumed my journaling practice to process and release feelings of guilt. I also rely on spiritual friends and counselors for support, as they serve as vital extensions of grace and peace. When I feel stuck, they provide valuable insight and strength, helping me navigate my journey with greater clarity and compassion.
In summary, processing the guilt associated with a cancer diagnosis is a journey of intentional release and radical self-compassion. The key is to avoid the trap of self-blame by embracing accountability and then choosing to extend grace to yourself. By separating past actions from your current worth, you can free yourself from the weight of condemnation and focus your energy on healing, both emotionally and physically. Ultimately, this allows you to reclaim your own narrative and move forward with purpose and peace.
So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus…
Romans 8:1
Soul Care with
Pastor Jenn
To Pastor (verb): to shepherd, advise, and guide into a place of deeper spiritual understanding
“And Boaz said to the elders and all the people, “You are witnesses this day that I have bought all that was Elimelech’s, and all that was Chilion’s and Mahlon’s, from the hand of Naomi. Moreover, Ruth the Moabitess, the widow of Mahlon, I have acquired as my wife, to perpetuate the name of the dead through his inheritance, that the name of the dead may not be cut off from among his brethren and from his position at the gate. You are witnesses this day.”
Ruth 4:9-10
I’ve been studying the book of Ruth for a few weeks now. If you haven’t visited it lately, it really is such a beautiful, engaging story. I encourage you to go back and read it. The thing that keeps stirring in my mind is the idea Boaz was a “kinsman-redeemer”. Now, I admit I don’t understand all the ins and outs of this custom but what I do know is he had the responsibility within his family lineage to step in and care for a deceased relative’s family. He would keep watch care and provide for that family. It’s quite a role, honestly. Quite a responsibility.
The interesting part of the story is who he redeemed. Yes, he redeemed Naomi. And consider all he redeemed her from – a life alone, poor, bitter, without a husband or children. In every way that matters, he redeemed her future. But he also redeemed Ruth, who wasn’t even from his tribe or culture – or faith, for that matter. But he was gracious and saw a picture so much bigger than even Ruth herself imagined. He redeemed her past and her present and secured her a beautiful future full of children and grandchildren. It really is something.
As beautiful as Boaz’s redemption was, it points to an even greater redemption. It’s also a foreshadowing of all Jesus would do for us. He is OUR kinsman-redeemer. The only one who could possibly save us from our past, stand with us in our present and give us a future worth living – Jesus did it all. In light of the story of Ruth, I’m so in awe (again) of Jesus. I pray this week you would have that sense of awe too, knowing that your kinsman-redeemer holds every part of your life in his hands and is planning extraordinary, beautiful things for you.
Caregivers Corner With
Four Things to Remember
Caregiver (verb): One who provides direct support for one who is in need of practical help, encouragement and love.
When you’re helping someone else, it’s easy to get so caught up in their needs that you neglect your own. But as the old saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup. To be truly effective in helping others, you have to prioritize your own well-being.
Here are four things to remember to take care of yourself:
1. Self-Care Isn’t Selfish, It’s Necessary
Change your mindset. Self-care isn’t a luxury; it’s a vital part of caring for someone else. Think of it like a marathon – you can’t finish the race if you don’t refuel. Simple, consistent actions like getting enough sleep, eating well, and taking short breaks can prevent burnout and help you stay strong for the long haul.
2. Set and Enforce Clear Boundaries
Be realistic about how much you can give and communicate those limits. It’s okay to say no to certain requests or to take a break when you need it. By setting healthy boundaries, you protect your own emotional and physical health and prevent resentment. You’re teaching others how to treat you and ensuring your support is sustainable.
3. Ask for Help and Accept It
You are not meant to do this alone. Reach out to friends, family, or support groups. Many people want to help but don’t know how. Be specific. Instead of saying, “I need help,” try saying, “Can you bring a meal on Tuesday?” or “Could you sit with them for an hour so I can go for a walk?” When help is offered, accept it gracefully.
4. Find Moments of Joy and Connection
It’s easy to get lost in the challenges, but it’s crucial to intentionally seek out joy and stay connected to things that matter to you. Whether it’s a hobby you love, a favorite song, or a few minutes of quiet reflection, these small moments recharge your emotional batteries. Remember who you are outside of this role and make time to connect with friends or family who can support you.
Worship Moment
with Joel Salabarria
To Inspire (verb): to fill someone with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.
Song: Back To You (Spotify and Apple Music)
Band: Michael Mudoh
From: “Back To You” (2025)
Sometimes the path feels unclear, but grace was guiding you the whole time. Every detour, every delay and even the silence, was God gently leading you back to His heart. Not because you earned it, or had pity for you, but because He never stopped loving you.
Let’s get back to HIM!
What if the prayers I prayed
Weren’t really meant for me
Cause My heart can lead me astray
You know what I really need
And the times that You told me to wait
Cause there’s more for me to see
So now I see
Lord it was You
Leading me to You
And I know it’s true
There’s nothing I can do
With you
You always lead back to You
Please help us out…
Take the Survey
To Encourage (noun): to give support and hope to someone so that they will do or continue to do something.
As we begin our third year of sharing stories through the Black Sheep Messenger and The Healing Chronicle, we’d love to hear from you. Yes… even you! Thank you for being willing…
Your feedback will help us understand what content is most helpful and meaningful to you, and what you’d like to see more of in the future.
If you haven’t already done so, please take a few moments to answer our quick, six-question survey. Your thoughts are greatly appreciated and will help shape the future of our newsletters.
Link HERE.
Nutrition Nuggets with
Suzanna Hake
To Nourish (verb): the act or process of being nourished.
Time for another of my favorite recipes, and with football season here, this is a snack favorite. Enjoy (guilt free) with MASA seed oil free Tortilla Chips!
Avocado Hummus Recipe
Ingredients
– 1 cup cooked chickpeas
– 1/2 avocado
–
1 clove of garlic
– 1 small bunch of cilantro
– 1/4 onion
– 1 Tbsp salt
– Juice of 1 lemon
– a pinch of cayenne pepper
– 1/2 Tbsp olive oil
Add all ingredients into a blender. Squeeze in the lemon juice, add salt and blend with water until you reach a creamy consistency.
The Serenity Prayer
To Pray (verb): Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Philippians 4:6)
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
While many are familiar with the Serenity Prayer, not many are familiar with its history. Over the years the prayer has been attributed to several great Christian thinkers including Thomas Aquinas, Augustine and Francis of Assis, but it was actually written less than a century ago in a cottage in western Massachusetts.
Reinhold Niebuhr was born the son of a German American pastor in Wright City, Missouri. He later became a pastor himself, serving a congregation in Detroit before moving to New York to teach at Union Theological Seminary, where he gained recognition as a theologian, activist and social critic. His brother, H. Robert Niebuhr, a well-known ethicist and theologian is best known as a founder of Christian Realism an approach to ethics grounded in the insight that human beings are called to strive toward their highest moral ideals, while recognizing our inability to fully achieve them. Richard writings deeply influenced his brother Reinhold who also had a poetic flair. And his infamous prayer beautifully captured the heart of Christian realism.
Piet's Ponderings
To Ponder (verb): to think about something carefully, especially before making a decision or reaching a conclusion.
I believe that starting the day with intention is crucial for setting ourselves up for success.
And I will concede that a good cup of coffee certainly helps, however, I’m becoming increasingly convinced that it takes more than that to prepare for the day’s challenges.
In fact, I have become very particular about thoughts and practices that begin my day.
My current routine is built around a very meaningful set of rituals. And yes, it starts with a good cup of coffee, but also includes reading, praying, stretching, plunging, and walking.
Beyond these physical practices, I find it helpful (even strategic) to make a definitive personal commitment (early in the day) to stay alert to the leadings and promptings of the Spirit throughout the day.
Because my daily purpose must be about something more than just making check marks on a to-do list; it must be about being present, open, and responsive to what truly matters.
Helping people…
Cultivating character…
Engaging in redemptive action…
Gaining the applause of heaven…
Quick Reminder
We have room for two more people in the Building Resilience Course. We had our orientation class this past Sunday, but you can still be a part! You can find out more HERE.
If you are ready to sign up please send a note to my executive assistant Jennifer <jennifer@20threesix.com> and she will get you everything you need.
Also, don’t forget, newsletter recipients got $150 discount off their registration fee, and scholarships are available!
Support the work!
The Van Waarde Foundation underwrites and supports a variety of projects related to supporting, educating, and encouraging fellow cancer warriors and their families.
Thank you in advance for your prayerful consideration.
https://www.patreon.com/c/pietvanwaarde
Experiencing a cancer diagnosis is obviously a profound personal setback, and the added weight of self-blame can make it feel even heavier. While it’s natural to reflect on past choices and wonder if you have contributed to our own illness, getting stuck in a cycle of self-condemnation is a separate matter altogether. It’s crucial to acknowledge these feelings of guilt and remorse without letting them define you or impede your journey toward healing. This involves taking a thoughtful and compassionate approach to your past.
The first step in processing this guilt is to separate accountability from condemnation. It’s helpful to own the reality that some past behaviors may have been unhealthy, but this is an entirely different concept from believing you deserve this illness. You can acknowledge, for example, that a long-term smoking habit increased your risk of lung cancer without believing you are a bad person or that this is a form of punishment. True ownership means recognizing the consequences of past actions and committing to better choices moving forward. This is a path of learning and growth, not a cycle of shame.
The goal – and this is really important – is to shift your focus from “Why was I so foolish?” to “What can I do now?”
Next, it is vital to learn and practice self-compassion and forgiveness. Think of it this way: You wouldn’t speak to a friend with a similar diagnosis in a harsh and condemning way; instead you would offer them kindness and empathy. You must extend that same grace to yourself. Forgiveness isn’t about excusing past mistakes; it’s about releasing yourself from the burden of carrying them. You are a person who made certain choices – and yes, maybe some were unwise and irresponsible – but your diagnosis is not meant to define your worth. I am speaking to you as one who has had to work through these very same feelings.
I have resumed my journaling practice to process and release feelings of guilt. I also rely on spiritual friends and counselors for support, as they serve as vital extensions of grace and peace. When I feel stuck, they provide valuable insight and strength, helping me navigate my journey with greater clarity and compassion.
In summary, processing the guilt associated with a cancer diagnosis is a journey of intentional release and radical self-compassion. The key is to avoid the trap of self-blame by embracing accountability and then choosing to extend grace to yourself. By separating past actions from your current worth, you can free yourself from the weight of condemnation and focus your energy on healing, both emotionally and physically. Ultimately, this allows you to reclaim your own narrative and move forward with purpose and peace.
So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus…
Romans 8:1
Soul Care with
Pastor Jenn
To Pastor (verb): to shepherd, advise, and guide into a place of deeper spiritual understanding
“And Boaz said to the elders and all the people, “You are witnesses this day that I have bought all that was Elimelech’s, and all that was Chilion’s and Mahlon’s, from the hand of Naomi. Moreover, Ruth the Moabitess, the widow of Mahlon, I have acquired as my wife, to perpetuate the name of the dead through his inheritance, that the name of the dead may not be cut off from among his brethren and from his position at the gate. You are witnesses this day.”
Ruth 4:9-10
I’ve been studying the book of Ruth for a few weeks now. If you haven’t visited it lately, it really is such a beautiful, engaging story. I encourage you to go back and read it. The thing that keeps stirring in my mind is the idea Boaz was a “kinsman-redeemer”. Now, I admit I don’t understand all the ins and outs of this custom but what I do know is he had the responsibility within his family lineage to step in and care for a deceased relative’s family. He would keep watch care and provide for that family. It’s quite a role, honestly. Quite a responsibility.
The interesting part of the story is who he redeemed. Yes, he redeemed Naomi. And consider all he redeemed her from – a life alone, poor, bitter, without a husband or children. In every way that matters, he redeemed her future. But he also redeemed Ruth, who wasn’t even from his tribe or culture – or faith, for that matter. But he was gracious and saw a picture so much bigger than even Ruth herself imagined. He redeemed her past and her present and secured her a beautiful future full of children and grandchildren. It really is something.
As beautiful as Boaz’s redemption was, it points to an even greater redemption. It’s also a foreshadowing of all Jesus would do for us. He is OUR kinsman-redeemer. The only one who could possibly save us from our past, stand with us in our present and give us a future worth living – Jesus did it all. In light of the story of Ruth, I’m so in awe (again) of Jesus. I pray this week you would have that sense of awe too, knowing that your kinsman-redeemer holds every part of your life in his hands and is planning extraordinary, beautiful things for you.
Caregivers Corner With
Four Things to Remember
Caregiver (verb): One who provides direct support for one who is in need of practical help, encouragement and love.
When you’re helping someone else, it’s easy to get so caught up in their needs that you neglect your own. But as the old saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup. To be truly effective in helping others, you have to prioritize your own well-being.
Here are four things to remember to take care of yourself:
1. Self-Care Isn’t Selfish, It’s Necessary
Change your mindset. Self-care isn’t a luxury; it’s a vital part of caring for someone else. Think of it like a marathon – you can’t finish the race if you don’t refuel. Simple, consistent actions like getting enough sleep, eating well, and taking short breaks can prevent burnout and help you stay strong for the long haul.
2. Set and Enforce Clear Boundaries
Be realistic about how much you can give and communicate those limits. It’s okay to say no to certain requests or to take a break when you need it. By setting healthy boundaries, you protect your own emotional and physical health and prevent resentment. You’re teaching others how to treat you and ensuring your support is sustainable.
3. Ask for Help and Accept It
You are not meant to do this alone. Reach out to friends, family, or support groups. Many people want to help but don’t know how. Be specific. Instead of saying, “I need help,” try saying, “Can you bring a meal on Tuesday?” or “Could you sit with them for an hour so I can go for a walk?” When help is offered, accept it gracefully.
4. Find Moments of Joy and Connection
It’s easy to get lost in the challenges, but it’s crucial to intentionally seek out joy and stay connected to things that matter to you. Whether it’s a hobby you love, a favorite song, or a few minutes of quiet reflection, these small moments recharge your emotional batteries. Remember who you are outside of this role and make time to connect with friends or family who can support you.
Worship Moment
with Joel Salabarria
To Inspire (verb): to fill someone with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.
Song: Back To You (Spotify and Apple Music)
Band: Michael Mudoh
From: “Back To You” (2025)
Sometimes the path feels unclear, but grace was guiding you the whole time. Every detour, every delay and even the silence, was God gently leading you back to His heart. Not because you earned it, or had pity for you, but because He never stopped loving you.
Let’s get back to HIM!
What if the prayers I prayed
Weren’t really meant for me
Cause My heart can lead me astray
You know what I really need
And the times that You told me to wait
Cause there’s more for me to see
So now I see
Lord it was You
Leading me to You
And I know it’s true
There’s nothing I can do
With you
You always lead back to You
Please help us out…
Take the Survey
To Encourage (noun): to give support and hope to someone so that they will do or continue to do something.
As we begin our third year of sharing stories through the Black Sheep Messenger and The Healing Chronicle, we’d love to hear from you. Yes… even you! Thank you for being willing…
Your feedback will help us understand what content is most helpful and meaningful to you, and what you’d like to see more of in the future.
If you haven’t already done so, please take a few moments to answer our quick, six-question survey. Your thoughts are greatly appreciated and will help shape the future of our newsletters.
Link HERE.
Nutrition Nuggets with
Suzanna Hake
To Nourish (verb): the act or process of being nourished.
Time for another of my favorite recipes, and with football season here, this is a snack favorite. Enjoy (guilt free) with MASA seed oil free Tortilla Chips!
Avocado Hummus Recipe
Ingredients
– 1 cup cooked chickpeas
– 1/2 avocado
– 1 clove of garlic
– 1 small bunch of cilantro
– 1/4 onion
– 1 Tbsp salt
– Juice of 1 lemon
– a pinch of cayenne pepper
– 1/2 Tbsp olive oil
Add all ingredients into a blender. Squeeze in the lemon juice, add salt and blend with water until you reach a creamy consistency.
The Serenity Prayer
To Pray (verb): Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Philippians 4:6)
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
While many are familiar with the Serenity Prayer, not many are familiar with its history. Over the years the prayer has been attributed to several great Christian thinkers including Thomas Aquinas, Augustine and Francis of Assis, but it was actually written less than a century ago in a cottage in western Massachusetts.
Reinhold Niebuhr was born the son of a German American pastor in Wright City, Missouri. He later became a pastor himself, serving a congregation in Detroit before moving to New York to teach at Union Theological Seminary, where he gained recognition as a theologian, activist and social critic. His brother, H. Robert Niebuhr, a well-known ethicist and theologian is best known as a founder of Christian Realism an approach to ethics grounded in the insight that human beings are called to strive toward their highest moral ideals, while recognizing our inability to fully achieve them. Richard writings deeply influenced his brother Reinhold who also had a poetic flair. And his infamous prayer beautifully captured the heart of Christian realism.
Piet's Ponderings
To Ponder (verb): to think about something carefully, especially before making a decision or reaching a conclusion.
I believe that starting the day with intention is crucial for setting ourselves up for success.
And I will concede that a good cup of coffee certainly helps, however, I’m becoming increasingly convinced that it takes more than that to prepare for the day’s challenges.
In fact, I have become very particular about thoughts and practices that begin my day.
My current routine is built around a very meaningful set of rituals. And yes, it starts with a good cup of coffee, but also includes reading, praying, stretching, plunging, and walking.
Beyond these physical practices, I find it helpful (even strategic) to make a definitive personal commitment (early in the day) to stay alert to the leadings and promptings of the Spirit throughout the day.
Because my daily purpose must be about something more than just making check marks on a to-do list; it must be about being present, open, and responsive to what truly matters.
Helping people…
Cultivating character…
Engaging in redemptive action…
Gaining the applause of heaven…
Quick Reminder
We have room for two more people in the Building Resilience Course. We had our orientation class this past Sunday, but you can still be a part! You can find out more HERE.
If you are ready to sign up please send a note to my executive assistant Jennifer <jennifer@20threesix.com> and she will get you everything you need.
Also, don’t forget, newsletter recipients got $150 discount off their registration fee, and scholarships are available!
Support the work!
The Van Waarde Foundation underwrites and supports a variety of projects related to supporting, educating, and encouraging fellow cancer warriors and their families.
Thank you in advance for your prayerful consideration.
https://www.patreon.com/c/pietvanwaarde
