Navigating the Waiting Game: Three Months and a Suspicious Spot...
Personal Update
In a couple of weeks, I’ll be heading back to the Mayo Clinic for my three-month check-in. My last visit in May was mostly positive, but the doctors did find a suspicious spot on my bladder wall. Given everything my bladder has already endured, they opted against any immediate invasive procedures like a biopsy or scope. Instead, they wanted to see me again in three months, and that time for a return visit is fast approaching. I wanted to take this opportunity to share some of what I’ve been learning during this waiting period.
One of the realities of this journey (for all of us) is the ebb and flow of hope. After my surgery last May, which involved removing my right kidney, ureter, and prostate (following six weeks of bladder chemotherapy), I felt genuinely hopeful. My subsequent two follow-up visits to Mayo were equally encouraging: clean scans, excellent blood work – everything was positive. Those visits filled me with hope, making me believe that this five-year battle with cancer might finally be nearing its end. I dared to imagine declaring myself “cancer free” and being one of the lucky ones.
That’s why my last visit was so difficult. Even with mostly good news, hearing “Hmmmm, not sure what that is. That doesn’t look right” was incredibly tough. It’s easy to spiral downward when faced with such ominous uncertainty. Waiting 90 days for definitive answers wasn’t an appealing option either. I knew I needed to find ways to keep my mind occupied to prevent myself from obsessing over the possibility of cancer’s return.
So, I focused on what I could do to maintain a positive mental state. In fact, I’d like to share the strategies I’ve found helpful. I hope these ideas might spark some fresh approaches for you too. After all, this rollercoaster journey is a common thread in many of our lives.
I began by praying for a creative idea that could anchor me during this uncertain time. For me, these promptings often come as an idea that feels “bigger” than myself, and what came to mind was surprisingly simple yet profoundly impactful: “Do something hard and fun.” It immediately resonated. While it sounds basic, I knew that pushing myself with challenging activities, interspersed with genuine fun, would help keep my mind focused on positive things.
THE HARD: You might remember my mentioning my 90-day challenge with my good friend, Otto. We turned our normal diet and exercise routines into a friendly competition. Otto follows a mostly plant-based diet, while I’m mostly animal-based. We started with a weigh-in, measurements, and noted our BMI and PBF. Our goal was to see whose approach would yield better results—a significant undertaking, especially with all the distractions of summer. We even added a fundraising component, allowing people to “vote” for their preferred approach or person, with all proceeds benefiting our foundation that supports cancer families with inspirational and pastoral care resources.
This contest has been incredibly effective in keeping my mind engaged elsewhere. I’ve been diving into podcasts, experimenting with new recipes, and meticulously tracking my macros on an app on my phone. Otto and I have also had a great time teasing each other and sharing “live” updates on Facebook. I’ve pushed myself at the gym, embracing new/more intense weight-training goals and routines. Hard and good!
THE FUN: Alongside this heightened discipline, I wanted to make sure to inject some fun activity into my summer schedule. With some unused air miles, I planned visits to beautiful places. Carol and I also decided to make a bigger deal out of our birthdays, Father’s Day, and July 4th. We entertained out-of-town friends, taking them to interesting spots we ourselves had wanted to explore. I even planted a new rose bush and helped my brother with a small house project. Good and fun!
This summer experiment has reminded me of the power of taking proactive steps to nurture our mental and emotional well-being, especially when facing life’s unexpected twists and turns. Now may I ask you something: What “suspicious spots” or uncertainties are you carrying right now? May I encourage you not to let worry consume you. It happens so easily. So give it a thought, perhaps you too might benefit from embracing your own “hard and fun” experiment.
Soul Care with
Pastor Jenn
To Pastor (verb): to shepherd, advise, and guide into a place of deeper spiritual understanding
“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.”
Ephesians 3:20
I was having a conversation with my parents this week about the “ordinary life”. When you really take time to pause and think, there are stellar moments in life – vacations with family, promotions at work, births, marriages – but most of life, for better or worse, is lived in the ordinary day to day. The sum of our years will have largely been spent going to work, cooking dinner, doing dishes, and caring for family.
I’ve been pondering this concept for a few days – it’s the ordinary that makes up the majority of a life. I’m certain that God doesn’t think less of the ordinary days than He does of the days we consider to be extraordinary. He is at work in them all.
And we can be too…
As Alistair Begg says, “There is no ideal place to serve God except the place He sets you down.” The best place to serve God is right where we are which, most of the time, is in the ordinary day to day. And yet, the Bible promises God can do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine BECAUSE His power is at work in us. Even in the moments that seem the most mundane to us. His power is still working.
I’m grateful to know that I don’t have to go over and above every day in order for God to do something really good. I pray you remember that for yourself this week as you go about the things God has set before you in wherever He has set you down.
Caregivers Corner With
Kathi Peters
Caregiver (verb): One who provides direct support for one who is in need of practical help, encouragement and love.
“Asking the Right Questions: The Caregiver’s Quiet Superpower”
For someone who has received a cancer diagnosis, it can be hard to hear—much less remember—what the doctor is saying. I can still remember the stunned look on my husband’s face at that fateful appointment. Truthfully, I feel like if I hadn’t been prepared with a notebook, neither of us would remember a bloomin’ thing! That’s why one of the most important things a caregiver can do is help make sure the right questions are asked, and that the answers don’t get lost.
In those early appointments, it’s easy for things to go in one ear and out the other. That’s not forgetfulness—it’s emotional overload. The person living with cancer may look like they’re listening, but later, they can’t remember what was said. That’s why I always bring a notebook. I write down questions ahead of time and take notes while the doctor talks—sometimes even word for word. It helps us remember the details and gives us something solid to share with family and friends afterward. Most of all, it helps my loved one feel less alone and more in control.
Here are a few simple ways to be a helpful advocate during appointments:
- Write down questions ahead of time. You never know when a good one will pop up—so keep a running list.
- Take notes during the visit. Focus on test results, treatment options, and next steps.
- Talk through what was said afterward. Reviewing together can help make sense of it all.(I find this important to do right after the appointment when it’s fresh in both our minds). Sometimes, the person you’re caring for doesn’t know what to ask—or feels embarrassed asking. You can gently help by saying things like:
- What’s been worrying you the most?”
- “Is there something you’ve been meaning to ask?”
- “Want me to help make a list before we go?”
At the end of the day, your steady presence—your listening, your note-taking, your willingness to stand beside them—is more than enough. A notebook may seem like a small thing, but it is such a helpful tool for clarity, courage, and connection.
Worship Moment
with Stephen McWhirter
To Inspire (verb): to fill someone with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.
Song: It Is Well (Spotify and Apple Music)
Band: Stephen McWhirter
From: “Hymns Session – EP” (2021)
While many modern worship songs offer comfort, this classic hymn carries a profound weight of testimony and enduring truth. The story behind it, written by Horatio G. Spafford after immense personal loss, makes its message of peace amidst suffering even more powerful.
Horatio G. Spafford, a successful Chicago businessman, lost much of his fortune in the Great Chicago Fire of 1871 and his only son to scarlet fever around the same time. In 1873, he sent his wife and four daughters on a ship to Europe, planning to join them later. Tragically, the ship sank, and all four of his daughters perished, though his wife miraculously survived. As Spafford sailed to meet his grieving wife, passing over the spot where his daughters died, he penned the profound lyrics, expressing a deep peace and unwavering faith in God despite his unimaginable sorrow. This timeless hymn, set to music by Philip P. Bliss, stands as a powerful testament to finding solace and hope amidst the deepest grief.
Poetic Encouragement:
When Hope Is Hard To Come By
To Encourage (noun): to give support and hope to someone so that they will do or continue to do something.
When Shadows Creep
When shadows creep and light grows dim,
And weary hearts feel hope wear thin,
Remember storms don’t rage forevermore,
A quiet sun awaits beyond the door.
Though heavy clouds may hide the blue,
And whispers of despair break through,
Hold fast to truth, though hard to find,
That strength resides within your mind.
For every struggle, every tear,
A seed of growth, to quell all fear,
A testament to what you’ll overcome,
A journey fought, a victory to become.
So breathe it in, this fragile grace,
And find the courage to keep your pace.
A flicker’s all it takes, you’ll see,
To light the path to what’s to be.
Hope isn’t lost, it merely sleeps,
In quiet moments, while sorrow weeps.
Awaken it, with gentle hand,
And rise again, across the land.
Nutrition Nuggets with
Suzanna Hake
To Nourish (verb): the act or process of being nourished.
Overnight Chia Oats (GF/DF)
2 tablespoons of chia seeds
1/3 cup rolled oats
3/4 cup almond or coconut milk
1 teaspoon vanilla
1.5 teaspoons maple syrup or honey
pinch sea salt
dash cinnamon
Combine all of the ingredients in a bowl. Transfer the mixture to a storage jar and place in the fridge
for a minimum of 4 hours but ideally 12 or more. The oats can stay in the fridge for 4 to 5 days.
Top with fruit if desired, then serve.
I love these little jars to make individual servings ready to grab and go.
A Prayer For Hope
When Hope Feels Far Away
To Pray (verb): Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Philippians 4:6)
Heavenly Father, we lift up our friends to You, knowing their hearts are heavy with the ache of health uncertainties. Their souls are restless, and the weight of uncertainty and pain often overwhelms them. In this moment, I ask for Your peace to settle deep within them, the kind of peace that surpasses all understanding. Quiet their anxious thoughts, calm their fears, and remind them that You are intimately acquainted with their suffering. Help them to surrender their worries and trust in Your unfailing love and sovereign plan, even when the path ahead seems dim.
Lord, I pray that You would minister to every part of their being – mind, body, and spirit. Heal them where they need healing, comfort them where they hurt, and strengthen them where they are weak. Help them to rest in the assurance that You are with them through every doctor’s appointment, every treatment, and every difficult day. May Your presence be a constant source of comfort, allowing their soul to find true rest and stillness in You, knowing that You hold their life in Your capable hands. In Jesus name. Amen.
Piet's Ponderings
To Ponder (verb): to think about something carefully, especially before making a decision or reaching a conclusion.
I am a sinner too…
I’ve been foolish too…
I’ve made choices that have hurt and disappointed people I love too…
I’ve had to own up to my mistakes and resist the temptation to excuse my poor behavior too…
I’ve had to look people I’ve loved in the eye and say, “Would you please forgive me” too…
One of the biggest lessons coming out of those experiences is not just that I am wholly dependent upon the mercy and grace of God, it is also that it is so easy to think and act as though we are better than anyone else.
It’s easy to look at others and say ‘How could you?!’ when we ourselves are guilty of the very same kind of sin – maybe not as publicly, maybe not as indiscreetly, and maybe not as flippantly – but certainly as much in thought if not in deed.
My heart breaks for these families and all those ill-affected by this personal tragedy. I do not judge them, I do not mock them, and I refuse to suggest I am any better than them.
Because the truth is, I am exactly like them… It is in us all…
My prayer is that God, in his infinite mercy would somehow redeem this for good for those whose lives will never be the same.
Support the work!
The Van Waarde Foundation underwrites and supports a variety of projects related to supporting, educating, and encouraging fellow cancer warriors and their families.
Thank you in advance for your prayerful consideration.
https://www.patreon.com/c/pietvanwaarde
