On the Journey With...
Nan Costello
It was a Sunday afternoon, and I got one of those calls that I both love and hate. It’s the call that another person has received that dreaded cancer diagnosis. I hate it for all the obvious reasons. It means another person has been assigned a very difficult life assignment. But, as strange as it sounds, I also love it, because it means another person was brave enough to reach out for support from a community that will walk with them. Such was the case when I met Nan a few weeks ago. Here is part of her story. Please join me in my prayers for her and her family.
I stumble as I begin to type these words.
Today has been a hard day.
I don’t know what makes the difference in a good or bad day after you’ve been diagnosed with cancer but today has been hard/bad. I know part of it is the fact that eating and sleeping are evading me. Every health expert will say those are two of the cornerstones (can you have two cornerstones?) in health. Oops. I just wish I could get out of my head and latch on to all the positive. So, I sit and write. It has always been my clearest way of communicating, the thing that helps me empty out the cobwebs of heart and mind. So, I press on, taking this journey now with a new community – one I have never really asked to be a part of – but one I have been most dubiously enfolded.
I hope it will be a very long journey in terms of years of life, but a short one in terms of sickness and talking/thinking about cancer every minute of every day. BLEH! I hate that more than anything. I just want to be me. All that negativity aside…I KNOW God is doing
something in me. I absolutely know that. I’m going through a refining fire and it is painful! And I am just at the beginning. But where God leads me, I want to go with trust and joy. That is my goal. I want my children and grandchildren to draw near to Jesus in this. When hard things come, we all have two options, towards Him or away from Him. I am choosing towards.
I have become so aware of people praying for me. I know you can allow others to carry your burdens at times, and Jesus is at the head of that list of burden carriers. And that is where I am looking. My biggest desire is to keep my Eyes. On. Jesus. To honor Him in what I do and who I encounter every step of this path.
Several Bible verses have comforted me in the last two weeks. The story in Matthew chapter 14 of Simon Peter wanting to walk on the water to Jesus is really resonating with me right now. The disciples are in the middle of a storm on the sea and Jesus decides to take a stroll out to them… by walking on the water! They see him and think He’s a ghost. When Jesus says “DO NOT BE AFRAID” Simon says “Lord, if it’s you, command me to come to you on the water” Jesus tells him to come.
One word, “come!”
Initially he walks on the water and comes to Jesus, but then is suddenly aware of the wind, and fear struck, and he began to sink. Because he took his eyes off of Jesus. He cries out to the Lord and Jesus “immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him ‘ O you of little faith, why did you doubt'”. They get back into the boat and the wind ceases. I love the word immediately in this. No hesitation. In modern terms He would say “I got ya!” Jesus, please hold me! Me, little Nan in all her ordinary, I need that rescue right now, that immediate rescue. Only He offers that.
I saw someone on social media recently say “You want to hear God’s voice? Open His mouth!” and he held up his Bible. So much truth in that simple statement. Alongside worship songs on repeat that is how I am learning to survive. I am working hard on keeping my eyes on Him – open to His word – trusting that he has it all in his most trustworthy hands!
Soul Care with
Pastor Jenn
To Pastor (verb): to shepherd, advise, and guide into a place of deeper spiritual understanding
“Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.”
Psalm 116:7
Remembrance. It’s what Memorial Day is all about. We sometimes spend it grilling outside or shopping. And there’s nothing wrong with those things, but at it’s heart, Memorial Day is about remembering what others have done for us that we could not do for ourselves.
I think remembering is good for us. Somehow, woven into our human nature is this chronic amnesia. We have moments that are worthwhile, encouraging, enjoyable and sometimes even holy. Somehow, after what seems like all too short a time, they fade into the background of our minds, tucked away along with all our other memories. But remembering forces us to dig them up and relive the moments…usually with a sense of gratitude.
Of course, the last time we feel like remembering the good in our lives is when we are smack in the middle of the bad. But those times maybe be the most important times for remembrance.
Undeniably, there have been moments in my life when God did something so outstanding, so unthinkable that I never even saw it coming. It blew my socks off! I called and told my friends and family about it. I spent moments with God in sincere gratitude. Just as undeniably, I’ve been in the valley wondering where God even is. The truth is, He’s just as present in the valley as He was in the miracle. And when I lose sight of that, I only need remember He does BIG things in my life. He has done them before and He will continue to do them in the future. It’s in the remembering that I find hope.
I pray for you this week, whether you find yourself on the mountaintop or in the valley, that you remember every single time God has showed up for you when you least expected. And in the remembrance, may you find the hope and courage to press forward in the journey you are on right now.
Caregivers Corner with
Lori Smith
To Support (noun): to provide assistance that enables one to function or act.
I’ll be the first to admit that summer is not my favorite season because I’m a native Texan, and summers in Texas are usually pretty brutal. Grueling heat aside, there are some things I really love about what summer represents. Carefree days, swimming (literally the only activity worth doing outside in Texas in the summer), long nights, vacation, and time for slowing down as a family, just to name a few.
But what I love most about summertime is the chance to reexamine the previous school year – what worked, what didn’t, what the next year will look like. To me, summer is like the new year, but better because there are no holidays to mark it. It’s just an unhurried time to reexamine and regroup.
My husband was first diagnosed in the summer, and we spent all of those three months in the hospital completing rounds of chemo to get him into remission. He also endured the clinical trial he was part of the following summer, which was more difficult than the year of his diagnosis. In that way summer has become harder for me. The memories of his last two summers with us are on my mind whether I want them to be or not. Yet, I find that as summer approaches, I still anticipate the goodness of slowing down, reexamining, and recentering myself around what matters the most. Faith and family.
Lamentations 3:40 reminds us:
Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.
As the summer begins, dear caregiver, I encourage you to do what you can to slow down and reexamine your journey. What are you able to keep doing? What do you need to seek help with? Where can you let go a little more – surrendering that thing, that thought, that ideal, to Jesus? Where do you need to hold on a little tighter? Carve out some time, as you are able, to pray and consider where the Lord is leading you on this journey. Maybe it’s not where you want to go, but you can trust Him to be with you every step of the way.
Worship Moment
It Is Well
To Inspire (verb): to fill someone with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.
Song: It Is Well With My Soul (YouTube, Spotify, YouTube Music and Apple Music)
Band: Chris Tomlin version
From: Live from “Good Friday”
While not a song we’d immediately connect to a patriotic holiday, it is a hymn that resonates deeply when considering the Christian understanding of loss, sacrifice and ultimate hope.
Imagine writing a song about peace and well-being, not from a mountaintop of victory, but from the depths of unimaginable pain. That’s exactly what Horatio Spafford did with “It Is Well With My Soul.” He’d just lost his four daughters to the unforgiving sea, a tragedy that would leave most of us completely undone. Yet, somehow, he found the words to express a profound peace that transcended his sorrow.
This raw, authentic understanding of grief and loss is what makes the song so powerful, especially for Memorial Day. We gather with friends and family to remember those who made the ultimate sacrifice, it’s a day marked with sorrow and reflection. “It Is Well With My Soul” doesn’t shy away from that pain – you can hear it in the line, “When sorrows like sea billows roll.” But, most importantly, it doesn’t leave us languishing there. Instead, it offers a gentle hand, guiding us towards the enduring hope that is always ours amidst any/all heartbreak.
Poetic Encouragement on
Memorial day
To Encourage (noun): to give support and hope to someone so that they will do or continue to do something.
Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die.
Nutrition Nuggets with
Suzanna Hake
To Nourish (verb): the act or process of being nourished.
Let me share one of my favorite holiday recipes you might like to try today. Easy and O so tasty!
Chickpea Salad
Combine in a small bowl:
3 Tbsp Olive Oil,
3 Tbsp Lemon Juice,
1 Pressed Garlic Clove,
1/2 tsp salt, and
1/8 tsp pepper. Whisk together.
Combine in a salad bowl:
1.5 cups cherry tomatoes (halved),
1 English cucumber (halved & sliced),
15 oz chickpeas (drained & rinsed),
1/2 medium red onion (thinly sliced),
1 avocado (sliced), 1/4 cup cilantro (chopped),
4 oz feta cheese.
Add dressing to taste. Toss to coat.
Enjoy!
Piet's Ponderings
To Ponder (verb): to think about something carefully, especially before making a decision or reaching a conclusion
You know, one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned lately is how often what we want clashes with what we’re willing to do. It’s like our most important dreams and hopes are on one side of a huge, challenging valley, and to get there, we have to cross a landscape of necessary but often uncomfortable practices.
The real trick to bridging that gap?
It all comes down to our persistent effort to push past that internal resistance. You know, that little voice that always whispers, “Just take it easy, stay comfortable.” Ugh, it’s a constant battle!
There’s no sugarcoating it – this process is tough. It’s an arduous journey, for sure. But here’s the thing: when you finally reach that goal, when you achieve what you set out for, the struggle suddenly seems absolutely, unequivocally worthwhile.
So, keep at it, my friends! Every ounce of effort you put in now will be rewarded. I’ll be praying for you, and I hope you’ll do the same for me.
A Healing Prayer
For Those Still Grieving the Loss of a Loved One
To Pray (verb): Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer ad petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God )Philippians 4:6)
As a cancer community we know something about the heartache and pain of loss, and therefore, I believe we can stand alongside grieving families in a way that few others can.
Heavenly Father,
On this Memorial Day, our hearts turn to you with both gratitude and a profound sense of sorrow. We come before you on behalf of the families across our nation who are still living with the raw ache of loss, the families whose loved ones made the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom and security.
We pray for those who carry the burden of an empty chair at the table, a voice that is forever silenced, and a future that looks different than they had imagined. Lord, you are intimately acquainted with grief and sorrow. You understand the depths of human pain. We ask that you draw near to them now.
Comfort them, Father, with a peace that transcends understanding. Mend their broken hearts and bind up their wounds. Remind them of the precious memories they shared, and help them to find glimpses of joy and gratitude even amidst their tears.
For those who feel isolated in their grief, surround them with a loving community that offers unwavering support and understanding. For those who question, provide clarity. For those who are weary, grant rest.
On this day of remembrance, we honor the lives that were given. May their sacrifice not be in vain, and may their legacy inspire us all to live lives worthy of the freedom they secured.
We ask all this in your holy name, Amen.
Thank you, Lori!
This is the last issue where Lori will be offering her perspective in “Caregivers Corner.” She is feeling a tug to start her own new business, and she won’t have the margin to continue writing. I think you will all agree that her contributions have been so spot on – insightful, vulnerable and authentic. Wel will miss her contributions, but we also wish her well in her new endeavors!
Bless you, dear lady!
Support the work!
The Van Waarde Foundation underwrites and supports a variety of projects related to supporting, educating, and encouraging fellow cancer warriors and their families.
Thank you in advance for your prayerful consideration.
https://www.patreon.com/c/pietvanwaarde
