On the Journey With
David Peters...
I met David at Hope4Cancer in Mexico. We became fast friends and shared many things in common. We were both pastors. We both love natural beauty and photography. But mostly we just believed in the power of walking out our journeys with other people – and we decided to walk together – and still do. I’m grateful for his willingness to share a portion of his journey with us here.
On Friday, November 18th, 2022 my oncologist said, “you have metastatic prostate cancer,” then… “prognosis is not good,” (not those exact words, but that was the message between the lines), then…“probably five years.” I know there were words and questions before and after that, but that’s all that seemed to get through.
I’ve watched it on TV. I’ve read stories. I’ve leaned in as friends and family members told me their “hearing the news” story. But somehow I felt immune to being a recipient of such news.
My wife, Kathi, and I left the doctor’s office in shock, not only about the stage of the cancer, but possibly more disillusioned by the suggested treatments the oncologist recommended we begin immediately. It was a long drive home with many tears shed before we surrendered to fitful sleep that night.
I could no doubt write a book on what I’ve learned and experienced in the often confusing labyrinth of natural healing that we have chosen. A journey with a long road yet ahead. But the one thing that I heard early on from my crazy friend who owns a vegan restaurant is that, “Love will heal you.”
That has stayed in the forefront of my mind for the last for the last 21 months. It’s my mantra really. Here’s some reflections about love that I wrote early on in my journey: I cry on most days. Not necessarily from sadness, but rather from an over-full emotional reservoir. Lately, I’m dipping more deeply into the well of my life than I have been used to. Even the simplest expression of love prompts a few tears. The experiences of these last weeks have somehow set my emotions adrift, and they are finding unpredictable places to moor.
Kathi notices this with an appreciative, “How sweet.” My grandson asks, “Pop Pop, why are you crying?” On a recent business call… yeah, that was a bit awkward. From this deep well of emotion I’ve drawn up a desire to express love with more attention and intention—both in my speaking and in my writing. “Love you.” “Love you, sister.” “Love you, brother.” “We both love and appreciate you!” “With love.” “Love ya’ man.” “You’re the best, love you.” “Love you much.” “With love and appreciation.” How easily these expressions roll off the tongue or close out an email or sign a birthday card. But, is each phrase more a cultural idiom than a deeply meaningful declaration?
Thoughtful “I love you’s,” for my wife, especially, and for my kids, grandkids and extended family, have always been easy for me to express. So I thought I would step up my game a bit and say/write the more direct “I love you” to more of you. The more the merrier, right?
To my surprise, putting this resolution into practice has created some mixed emotions, some thoughtful hesitation on my part. Placing the “I” in front of “love you” makes it sound much more personal. Intimate. Deeper. As I widen the circle a bit, could my words possibly be misunderstood? Unwanted? Plus, I’ve had to face my own interrogation; do I really love them? Do I show it? Why am I hesitating? What definition of love do I bring to each recipient of these words? Lots of questions. This experiment has prompted me to take another look at love. Maybe put a finer point on how I define it.
First kiss? Last goodbye? Baby’s breath? Friendship? Puppies? Coffee? What is it? When I try to pin it down, I find that love defies definition. Love can feel like a hot potato. True love hurts. It torments. It tantalizes. Love takes us to the depths of human experience where infinite joy and deep sorrow are constant companions. We can feel such a love for another that our heart literally hurts in their absence. People have died from a broken heart you know. To love is to risk it all. A declaration of love opens the door to possible rejection, to unrequited love. Friends, children, lovers who move on without us. Love can leave us in an ocean of tears.
Still, if there was no lost love, I supposed there would be no shared love. Poetry and song can take us on a journey into love’s shadow or reveal love’s light in the darkest of nights.
Jesus said that all the law and the prophets are wrapped up in this one thing. Love. Love is truth. During this season in my life, I feel Truth is leading me closer to this thing called love. To search its depths. To squeeze the juice of life from it. To say it. Mean it. Express it. Take risks with it. Maybe you’ll join me peering deep into life’s well to ponder the question asked by the Bee Gees back in the 70’s; “How deep is your love?”
Soul Care with
Pastor Jenn
To Pastor (verb): to shepherd, advise, and guide into a place of deeper spiritual understanding
A few words on confession…
I think confession gets a bad rap. It’s like a dirty word. We all know it’s important, but nobody wants to talk about it, maybe because it’s so often associated with sin. And, yes, that is one aspect of confession, but it’s not the whole picture. It’s so important that we grasp the entire scope of confession. If we don’t, we risk always being afraid or ashamed of it when it’s really such an incredible tool towards healing.
At its root, confession is simply to make something known. You might have heard someone say they confessed their love for another person, or they confessed a like or dislike of something. I believe confession is the opening of yourself and your feelings to another person. It’s the act of sharing, yes, your fears and your shortcomings, but also your dreams and longings. It’s letting another person in, not because they have the power to fix anything, but because God never intended us to carry the weight of any of those things alone. His design was always community. We saw Jesus live that out in his time on earth and God encourages us to do the same.
If you need permission to not hold it all yourself, I give that to you today. Share the “heavy” parts of your heart with another person and through their willingness just to be present and listen, the world will somehow feel a little lighter.
Caregivers Corner with
Lori Smith
To Support (noun): to provide assistance that enables one to function or act.
No one asked you if you wanted to be a caregiver. There was no job interview, no resume to submit, and no consideration for what you wanted. Cancer just came in and disrupted every facet of your family’s life. And once that diagnosis arrived, there was no going back to “normal.”| There was only walking forward into the unknown land of Cancer. Maybe you are still actively raising children, as I am. Maybe you are the parent of a child with cancer. Maybe it’s just you and your spouse. Whatever the case may be, you have now been handed the role of caregiver. It’s humbling.
In 1 Corinthians 12:4, Paul tells us There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but the same God works all of them in all men. So what’s your gift? What can you offer your person as their caregiver? I am good at organization, and I’m good with managing time. So, I very naturally managed all of my husband’s clinic visits, procedures, and his medication. He took a LOT of medication, and it changed frequently. I know he was grateful for my ability to know what and when it needed to be taken. In that, I also discussed and reviewed his med list with the nurses every week, and sometimes even pointed out when two meds conflicted with one another. Several nurses even asked if I was a nurse! I suppose it is just one of the gifts the Lord gave to me, and most of the time I felt confident that I was doing my part and what God called me to do. But there were days when I was bitter. Before cancer, I was homeschooling our three children, and was happy to be available to my kids most of the time. All of that changed in the blink of an eye, as we were thrust into a medical crisis. I had to pray and ask God to not allow a root of bitterness to grow. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
No two caregiver’s look the same because no two cancer journeys are the same. The key is knowing your gifts and working within the dynamic that’s already been established between you and your person. Communicate with each other to make sure he/she appreciates what you are offering as a caregiver. Pray and ask God to help you use your gifts and talents for such a time as this, and watch as He honors your heart of service.
Worship Moment with
Joel Salabarria
To Inspire (verb): to fill someone with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.
Song: Crazy Love (Spotify, YouTube and Apple Music)
Band: Maverick City
From: The Maverick Way Complete * 2023
This song really gets me because I love how FRANK the verses are. I love that in-spite of how unqualified or unworthy I feel and or am, His love is still given to me FREELY! However the song still challenges me gently to take action on the fact that I have access to Jesus and His love!
I didn’t know the love but I heard its stories
Took me by surprise when I saw it coming
Somehow I knew the voice when I heard it calling
Don’t have it figured it out but I do know one thing
You can try fighting
Deny it
But it’s always gonna welcome you
Try running
Try hiding
It’ll always find a way to you
Ohh… It’s a crazy love
Ohh… You can’t add it up
It’s better than I could ever imagine
I could never get enough
Ohh… It’s a crazy love
Love what it does and it wants to know you
It didn’t need a yes when it died to save you
Poetic Encouragement with
Julie Clarke
To Encourage (noun): to give support and hope to someone so that they will do or continue to do something.
Let Him Be, in Me
Through the promise of “let it be”
I pray you’ll do your working
In confidence, I remove me
Because around here doubt’s still lurking
I pray you’ll fill this precious soul
And teach this heart to sing
I pray you’ll grow me up “just right!”
Lift this hand up with your ring
Teach the respect, dignity and honor
To give it and to receive it
Teach me your word this mighty sword
And teach them to believe it
I place this soul in your hands
And I know you’ll pull it through
It’s strong, It’s brave, It’s confident
Because in this heart is you!!
Nutrition Nuggets with
Suzanna Hake
To Nourish (verb): the act or process of being nourished.
FREE Healing Tools:
When you think about it, there are simple ways for us to heal, and when done on a consistent basis, can have a radical impact on our health.
- Movement – releases endorphins and helps relieve stress.
- Breathing fresh air – increases energy levels.
- Sunshine – boost in Vitamin D for immune system.
- Meditation – helps regulate your nervous system.
- Hydration – flushes toxins from your body.
- Plants – cleans toxins from your home and upgrades indoor air quality.
- Creativity – connects you with your inner child.
- A friend – healing happens in community.
Which of these will you invest in this week?
Today I’m committing myself afresh to a combo of 3, 5, and 8.
Prayer of the Week
Reverend Larry Hess
To Pray (verb): Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer ad petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God )Philippians 4:6)
Gracious God,
I call on you right now in a special way.
It is through your power
that I was created.
Every breath I take,
every morning I wake,
and every moment of every hour,
I live under your power.
I ask you now to touch me
with that same power.
For if you created me from nothing,
you can certainly recreate me.
Fill me with the healing power of your spirit.
Cast out anything that should not be in me.
Interested in supporting this new initative?
The Van Waarde Foundation underwrites and supports a variety of projects and team members committed to supporting, educating, and encouraging fellow cancer warriors and their families. As we look to the future, we are excited about creating a variety of new resources that will provide pastoral support to those battling cancer. This initiative will include this newsletter AND a host of other resources including a new podcast providing helpful information on health and fitness, fresh pocket prayers delivered daily to fellow cancer warriors, a new page on the website “heal” Heal – Piet Van Waarde with weekly reflections on navigating the “dailyness” of the journey, plus a soon-coming book Keep on Healing that will address the top 50 questions people face when confronted by a cancer diagnosis. We want to make these resources available at little/no cost to those who need them, and your support through the Foundation (https://www.patreon.com/pietvanwaarde) makes that possible.
Thank you in advance for your prayerful consideration.
